DuncanMethosSwords
andFightingHighlanderCommotion

by Luminosity

 

Disclaimer: Do I have to disclaim this? It's, ummmm, homage.

06/99


Sung to the tune of "Supercalifragilistic"

 

Methos was a myth, a legend, hiding with persistence,
Working in a research job that questioned his existence.
Until he met Duncan MacLeod, he met little resistance.
Methos was a myth, a legend, hiding with persistence!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye...

He traveled all around the world and everywhere he went
He kept a very low profile, well you knew what I meant!
Till the day he met the famous Highlander MacLeod:

"Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod!"
"Methos?!"
"Beer?"

Methos hid himself away so he wouldn't cause suspicion
But 3,000 years ago, he was the father of perdition
He was the very oldest one, a precarious position
Methos hid himself away so he wouldn't cause suspicion!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

He showed up unexpectedly at the door of Duncan's place.
Argued about chivalry till Mac painted on his face.
Whacked out Kristin on the beach, never mind that she wore lace:

"Candygram"
"Methos?!"
"Somebody had to do it!"

Methos survived two centuries and never took a head
Thought that he'd be happier if he were live, not dead
You cannot fight my battles, Mac, yes, this is what he said
Methos survived two centuries and never took a head!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Duncan had a Quickening that was the opposite of light
He almost took off Richie's head and jumped a boat by night
He ended his employment there by getting in a fight:

"Get In!"
"Methos!"
"What do you want? An written invitation?"

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Methos hung out at the barge, didn't want to live in dives
Did he tell the Highlander that he had that many wives?
I wonder if he and Gina D did actually cross knives:

"It's my barge now"
"Methos!"
"These sheets are disgusting!"

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Methos showed up unannounced, on Duncan's bed reclining
He sought out the fake Methos to see what he was designing
Richie asked him for advice, as usual, he was whining
Methos showed up unannounced, on Duncan's bed reclining!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Methos never talked about what happened way back when
Times were different; things were different; he was different then.
Then one day to his surprise, Kronos met him with a knife:

"Greetings, Brother!"
"Uhh, yessss?"
"Let's go back to our old life!"

"I go with the winner, too!"

They met again on Holy Ground, and no fighting was allowed
Methos added more regrets to what was already a crowd
That he set the whole thing up was the opinion of MacLeod
They met again on Holy Ground, and no fighting was allowed!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Amanda woke up Methos in the middle of the night
Something about Duncan and Culloden and a fight
They argued in the Gardens, and MacLeod was none too bright:

"Not perfect? Or not going to die?"
"Methos?!"
"You're such a pain in the ass!"

Methos saw his old friend Byron felled by Duncan's sword
George was feeling murderous, resentful, even bored
No more pretty songs and poems, no more adoring horde
Methos saw his old friend Byron felled by Duncan's sword!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Duncan thought he saw a ghost, but it was pretty hazy
Kronos payed a visit too, and Methos thought his friend was crazy
Before Mac put down Ahriman, Richie was pushing up a daisy:

"Mac, you need help"
"Methos?!"
"Absolutely not!"

Duncan had survival skills, but it was looking pretty grim
He faced his death so valiantly, the chance to save him pretty slim
Fitz took him on a mystery tour in a world devoid of him
Duncan had survival skills, but it was looking pretty grim!

Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye
Umm-diddle-diddle-diddle, umm diddle-eye....

Methos, Joe, Amanda, Mac joined in a celebration
Toasting each other joyfully sans decapitation
And I'm so very thankful now for Sci-Fi syndication--
Methos, Joe, Amanda, Mac joined in a celebration!

 


Finis